Wow, 2025 is over again, and what a rollercoaster it was! Even though I'm an editor and love writing, I'm not much of a journaler (too lazy, or just plain busy!).
I finally took a closer look at last year and what I did. And wow, I look back on an incredibly full and rich year that went in all directions. It felt like I snapped my fingers and everything just happened, but I also worked hard, even though it doesn't always feel that way.
To bring order to my chaotic mind, I like to use clear bullet points:
– Traveled to Portugal twice for unforgettable breathwork trainings (discovered that embodiment, safety, and connection are my keys to being. I have a new family)
– Delved deeper into breathwork and, through that, delved into myself (Mela's monthly, free online breathwork sessions are such a gift! My energetic limbs started floating, my torso and especially my left shoulder anything but)
– Attended a 10-day Vipassana program at another organization (what a world of difference: more relaxation and the art of the middle path)
– Started a massage training program (finally, my hands can do their thing again)
– From April to December, I was able to lead more than 60 (mostly free) sessions and even exchanged sessions with some clients (as if I didn't do anything else, and so grateful for being allowed to be/see vulnerable). And that's not even counting the massage exchanges with my wonderful fellow students. I'm incredibly proud that a client has completed a series of 10 wonderful breathwork sessions with me! And now the first paying clients are signing up.
– Spaceholding once or twice a month at Ecstatic Dance in Wageningen and Ede (my new family is growing steadily).
– The death of a dear friend and experiencing the warmth of the community around her.
– I rigorously reassessed family/friendship ties (both strengthened and created distance), which led me to the Healing Garden festival. And I was able to reconnect with my Gouda family after more than 20 years.
– Attended an Enlightenment Intensive retreat in Wales (the question "Tell me who/what you are" continues to intrigue me).
– I felt more at home in my mobile home and at the recreation park (experiencing the summer and meeting lovely neighbors helped).
– Visited many potential practice locations in the region (made special connections and learned a lot about what makes me happy and what doesn't). Co-hosted a location in Arnhem for a few months.
– Started as an entrepreneur and created a website and flyers (yes, I'm proud, and I should really dwell on that more).
– Volunteered during hug-mother Amma's visit to the Netherlands (this time I didn't need a hug, but was more than happy to serve).
When I let that immense list and the impressions sink in, my head almost explodes. Mostly from happiness and gratitude.
Partly because of the last breathing training (and the homecoming) in December, I noticed that – although there are always struggles and setbacks – I long for life in a community. That might be something to explore in the new year. Just like scaling back the intensity of my life a bit. I would burn out before I leave for good.
Although I'm something of a visionary, I'm not the kind who gets to work on intentions for the new year. So I don't know if I'll post anything about my goals and wishes. Endlessly merging with the here and now is already a beautiful achievement.
Happy New Year to all of you!
